“Make the best use of what is in your power, and take the rest as it happens.” — Epictetus.

The Morning Fun

• I wake up every day at 5
• I leave for the office at 7:05

I have 125 minutes to do all of the following:

• Freshen up
• Write my journals
• Exercise
• Arrange fruits for the day
• Water plants
• Get ready
• Eat breakfast

The bus stop is exactly 1200 meters away. And I need a 10–11 minute brisk walk to complete this distance. If I am running late, I pray to God that I get a rickshaw (yes, we in India have the privilege of not calling Uber, yet getting a taxi) or a lift.

So, if I am off by 2–3 minutes, I run a serious risk of missing my scheduled bus and hence the discipline for the rest of the day.

• I can’t control the bus — it can be late, or it can be on time. But I can control how I spend these 125 minutes.
• I can’t control the presence of rickshaws. But I can control how fast I should walk.
• I can’t control how my morning mood will be. But, I control the time I wake up and sleep, so I don’t live a ‘rush’ morning and feel tired.
• I can’t control the speed of time. But, I control the preparation I need to do the previous night to prepare for the next day.

I control what I am supposed to control so that the things I can’t control don’t bother me.

When I try to control what I can’t or should not, I disallow myself to control what is supposed to be.

Aspects of Your Life That You Can Control (but think otherwise!)

1. The number of hours you sleep.
2. The food you eat.
3. The books you read.
4. The amount of time you ‘spend’ on social media, NEWS, watching sports, movies, and other stuff on your smartphones.
5. Your reactions to others’ words.
6. The words you speak and how you communicate them to others.
7. The goals and the path you choose to achieve these goals.
8. The way you treat success.
9. The amount of time you spend on your couch with the TV remote, sugary drinks, and salty snacks in your hand.
10. What you share and what you seek in return.

Allowing external events to consume much of your energy and time turns your life into something that is never in your control.

But when you own the stuff you can control and disown the stuff you can’t, you get the freedom to choose the right things.

Aspects of Life That You Can’t Control (but think otherwise!)

1. Others’ reactions, time, and moo,d.
2. Time.
3. Change.
4. Past and Present — You don’t own them.
5. Aging — embrace it.

“You cannot control the outcome. You can only control the effort, dedication, and the giving of one hundred percent of yourself to the task at hand. And then, whatever happens, happens.” — Tom Gayner, CO-CEO/Chief Investment Officer at Markel Corp.

The Noise — I Can’t Control

• I am a bookaholic.
• I don’t commute or travel without my books.
• And I commute using the public mode of transport.

But how to ensure focus and concentration on a noisy public commute?

It’s never easy to find focus and concentration in such places. And, especially for a habit like reading.

People are on phone calls, some are snoring badly, and the music is finding its way out of the earphones — small things can instantly break your focus.

The external noise is not in my control. Even if I request one person, that will not solve the purpose.

So, I create my sanctuary. I create walls around me. And, then, I sit down in silence within these four walls.

I don’t try to control others; I instead take control of SELF.

Don’t expect others to reduce their noise, find your ‘walls,’ sit inside within these walls, and welcome silence.

• Silence is your chance to listen.
• Silence is your chance to be in control.

Seek The Power. Switch on the Right Button.

Your focus on things under your control is the switch that can light the correct bulb. And, when this bulb emanates light, you gain power.

• Your distraction is in your control.
• Your energy is in your control.
• Your time is in your control.
• Your reactions are in your control.

Seven Simple Tools to Regain the Control

1. Practice deep breathing — A 2017 study of 40 healthy adults found that those who underwent an 8-week training course in diaphragmatic breathing experienced reduced negative responses to stressful situations.
2. Journal — Let your mind empty itself. Let your mind speak for itself. The things you can and can’t control will automatically appear on the paper.
3. Flexibility — Build flexible plans. Too much discipline might become counter-productive. Keep an analog to-do list with you. It will help you be flexibly disciplined.
4. Stand the itch of doing what others are doing — Social media, gossip, honking on the road, binge-watching, binge-shopping; you are doing a lot of this because you believe others are doing it too. What if they are thinking the same? Take back the control.
5. Make the best use of time — avoid time wasters. When you ask for control, time will give you that control. Time is powerful; respect it. Making the best use of time doesn’t mean keeping yourself busy.
6. Rest — Make sure you give your body and mind proper rest. Sleep is medicine. Don’t compromise on quality and quantity. A well-rested body will help you control what you can.
7. Morning routine — Win your mornings, and you will win your day. I don’t know who said it earlier, but I believe this. The first couple of hours of my mornings is mine. When I control them, the remaining hours respect me and return the focus and productivity.

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Nishith is an author and creator of a unique self-development platform — “Be Better Bit-By-Bit.” Grab a copy of his books — Be Better Bit-By-Bit and My Daily 5-Minute Gratitude Journal.

Listen to his podcasts Be Better Bit-By-Bit and 10 Bullets — 100 Words Book Summary.